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Adventures of a Suburban Kitty: The Price of Love

Tuesday, November 2, 2010

The Price of Love

A love letter to my furriends.

I got some news tonight that's making me think really hard about all I've learned in the past year, and especially since I've been on Twitter and blogging. I've made a lot of good friends since I joined the anipal world. I've lost a lot of friends, too. And tonight I heard that another pal, Inigo Flufflebum, may be headed for the Rainbow bridge.

For some reason, this one is hitting me much harder than any of the others, and I don't really know why. Maybe because there have been so many lately. Maybe because Mom and I went through this the same time last year with my sisfur, Sheena. Maybe because it looked like he was going to get better. Maybe because I flirt with him and Rumbles so much. Maybe because the two of them always make me smile. Whatever the reason, the thought of losing Inigo is leaving a big hole in my heart, and my eyes won't stop leaking.

I know it will eventually have to happen. I know that at some point, it will be what's best for Inigo, and he'll let his family now when that is (hopefully not for a while yet). That doesn't make it hurt any less. But I guess that's the price we pay for letting others into our lives. The more we love, the more we have to lose and the more it hurts. The selfish part of us wants to hold on to those we love for as long as possible. When they leave, they leave an emptiness that no one can fill. But eventually, leave they must, just as we will when our time comes.

The pain of loss is a high price to pay. But what's the alternative? Not let others in to out lives? Not ever care about anyone or have anyone care about us? To be lonely and alone so we don't suffer the pain of loss? I think that would be a worse pain and a higher price. So I let others in. I care. I love. And when someone crosses the bridge, I hurt and I get leaky eyes. Yes, it's a high price to pay, but I pay it gladly.

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23 Comments:

At November 2, 2010 at 11:11 PM , Blogger blindmaximus said...

Well said, Pumpkin. Our eyes are leaking also.

 
At November 2, 2010 at 11:47 PM , Anonymous JoeyBeanCat said...

As Maximus pointed out, this is extremely well put. Mom and I have been thinking about love and loss a lot lately, probably because so many anipals seem to be going to the bridge. We both agree that it's better to love and have to let go than to not love at all. The things that those we love bring into our lives are well worth the scars on our hearts.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 1:45 AM , Blogger pasikas said...

Aaaah PumpkinXX beautifully said.Pain of loss is part of loving.Never close your heart to love,its being a whole living being. I have read about Inigo too and feel the pain for his wonderful family.Love will guide them.PASIKISSES XX

 
At November 3, 2010 at 2:01 AM , Blogger MizzBassie said...

What a nice post, Pumpkin! But I would say that the pain of losing the ones we love is a bargain compared to all we get from sharing our life with them. So I share willingly and I cry when I say goodbye but I don't regret it for a moment. Purrrrrrrrrrrrrrs

 
At November 3, 2010 at 5:43 AM , Blogger The Paw Relations said...

What a beautifully written post.

Purrs to all those in their time of need.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 6:24 AM , Blogger Kea said...

Your post made our mom's eyes all leaky too; it was beautifully written.

We've been to Inigo's and Rumbles' blog and read the update, left our purrs and purrayers. We're in denial at the moment, because it seems he's still enjoying life and that it's far too soon. We know eventually it will be his time, as it will be for us all, but we do hope not today.

Not any day in the near future.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 6:39 AM , Blogger Caren Gittleman said...

Beautiful, Beautiful post.....our hearts ache and our eyes are crying for our dear, dear friend Inigo and his most special family

Love, Caren and Cody

 
At November 3, 2010 at 7:00 AM , Anonymous ShaynaCat said...

Didn't know about Inigo, & my eyes are leaking, too. There have been such a lot of anipals crossing the bridge recently, and my heart goes out to them and their families.

Yesterday, on All Souls' Day, I caught myself wondering for a moment if it really is worth all the pain of loving anipals and humans.

This lovely post provides the answer.

Thank you.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 7:17 AM , Blogger Mariodacat said...

Beautifully said Pumpkin. It is worth it tho, even though we hurt so much when dey cross the bridge. We have been blessed with so many good friends on FB and Twitter, and I cherish each one of dem.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 7:41 AM , Blogger Shawnee the Shepherd said...

The one thing we find so sad is when peeples has an anipal go to the bridge and they say they will neffur has anudder coz it hurt too much. Our lives do be all the richer for those wot we has known. How dull our lives would be if'n we stopped sharing with udders.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 7:58 AM , OpenID snowshoecats said...

It's true, but the alternative of not sharing that love (no matter for how short a period)is just as unbearble!!! The love we have in return is worth every bit of pain we may suffer one day.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 8:22 AM , Blogger Brian said...

I know, I agree totally, for some reason this one is really tough, as was Sniffie and the others, but this one, whew, makes my whiskers weepy wet too. My Dad and Mom went through the exact same thing with one that was before me so they really understand what they are going through. We will continue to send our purrs their way.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 9:22 AM , Blogger Pish Posh Says said...

My people and I feel with you. We do not know your friend but we have friends of our own who are of such a magnitude in our lives that it makes us stop and contemplate everything when something happens to them. It is because you are so special that these events hurt and that is what makes you special. Full circle. Beautiful in its simplicity. And, yes, definitely well worth the price. Thank you for allowing us to see your sad moments as well as your happy moments. They are all a treasure.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 10:13 AM , Blogger Cathy Keisha said...

Life yourself, Inigo's illness hit me harder than most because I was one of his first Foxy Friday girl cats. I feel a special bond to him. Once there's no quality of life, it's best though to assist your lifelong pal to the Bridge.

My peeps always say they'll never have another cat after one of theirs die but then the house gets so cold and empty, they have to adopt a new one of us.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 10:25 AM , Blogger Lily said...

Mom's eyes are leaking about Inigo too, thank you for expressing so beautifully what so many of us are feeling about love and loss. The beautiul unconditional love of a pet is worth the eventual pain of being seperated. Belief in the Rainbow Bridge helps, knowing we will be together again is a comfort. Thanks Pumpkin for a great blog entry,
<3 Lily

 
At November 3, 2010 at 10:43 AM , Blogger Pumpkinpuddy said...

Rumbles and Inigo were my first furriends when I started blogging. It was they who introduced me to everyone else with this blog: http://rumble-bum.blogspot.com/2010/04/new-friend-rumblepurr.html. Without them, I wouldn't have all the wonderful furriends I've made since I started blogging. The Rumblefamily is very special to me and I guess that's why this is hitting me so hard.

Thank you to everyone who read my blog and for all the wonderful comments.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 11:10 AM , Blogger Bunny Jean Cook said...

I understand Pumpkin - it is always hard losing a furend. Rumbles was one of mai very first furends on twitter. I am sorry dat it is time for Inigo to cross da RB, but I also know dat it helps Rumblemum to have her furends be der for support.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 1:11 PM , Blogger Bear said...

What a beautiful post Pumpkin. Mom says it is always worth it. Even though there is such a pain in loss, it comes with the pleasure of wonderful memories, which when cherished,helps us heal.

 
At November 3, 2010 at 2:11 PM , Blogger Teri and the cats of Furrydance said...

Oh yes, us too...our Teri lost her mostest favoritist kitty, Bo to HCM and this does hit close to home when you have gone thru it before, doesn't it. May Inigo get lots of kisses and nuzzles and anything he wants to eat and may he get to spend moments, many moments being loved...it is hardest for those of us left behind...

 
At November 3, 2010 at 5:47 PM , Blogger The Island Cats said...

We are very sad about Inigo, too, Pumpkin. Sometimes it seems so unfair...

We're purring for him and Rumblemum because we know how hard this is for her.

But, it is better to have love and lost...than to never have loved at all....

 
At November 5, 2010 at 2:54 PM , OpenID Snotface Ferret said...

My Stephanie lets her eyes leak on these occasions, and she tells me it is not because she didn't love them. She cries because there was a moment when they were in pain or uncomfortable.

She knows that these critters had lotsa luv from every avenue (home, tweeter, & their blog and fans!) All of us will have Inigo Flufflebum's best times to look upon in our memories!

 
At November 5, 2010 at 8:46 PM , Blogger Inigo Flufflebum and d'Artagnan Rumblepurr said...

Oh my friend... I'm only just seeing this now. Thank you so much for such a beautifully written post.

We've been so blessed to know you. I know what you mean, I feel like I have so many friends in the world and their lives are important to me, even if we only catchup virtually.

Inigo seems happy again today. I continue to hope for a miracle for him, he's just the most loving boy. I tell him all the time that he 'just loves to be loved' and it's true. I know he feels the love from you, and it helps him get stronger.

 
At November 6, 2010 at 6:54 PM , Anonymous cats of wildcat woods said...

Lovely post and so true. Losing our beloved animal friends never gets easier but we cherish all the memories we have after they are gone. we are hoping Inigo will be around for a while longer. Oh ya - we came by to thank you for coming to Snowball's party!

 

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